I've always been annoyed by the smug-sounding "Mothers Who Think" writers. They imply that the majority of mothers don't think, oooh, they are so much more cerebral than the rest of us. I've always been one of the Mothers Who Drink crowd. Two of my favoritests mom friends used to be bartenders.
It's not so much of an Absolutely Fabulous kind of drinking, like it was in my pre-child days; it's more of a "mother's little helper" kind of drugging ourselves into submission.
Amongst mothers I know, the eternal question is "where can we go, with our kids, and drink?" There's a hip bar with a sunny back patio which used to allow children, but alas, their scofflaw ways have come to an end, and they're evicting toddlers. Restaurants are more expensive than dive bars, we have learned. Some cafes have beer and wine licenses, but often we long for cocktails. Often the answer is my own home, where I make a fabulous margarita if someone can keep the children busy long enough. My husand has been trained to make manhattans, martinis, and gin fizzes (I do love a retro cocktail). More likely we open a bottle from my private cellar (i.e. whatever I picked up at Trader Joe's, usually Two Buck Chuck or Four Buck Fred).
You'll run across a lot of people who are all strident about mothers who booze it up. My point of view is that if I'm not blacking out or passing out (and I'm not), then I'm just fine. Mellow me out with a couple of cocktails, and I'm a fun mother with lots of patience and humor.
4 comments:
Glad to meet another drinking mom! I'm sure some would be shocked and maybe I'm pathetic, but after 11 years of being a stay-at-home mom, I've found this year that a glassa wine or a couple of my husband's beers help get me through the day. It's lonely and monotonous being at home and struggling to have some adult mental stimulation. Mundane housework and children's games take a toll on sanity after so long. I love my children, but this mom needs a break! I'm not slopping drunk and I'm not stupid: I make sure I'm able to drive when it's time to drive and I get the needed things done, but sure helps take the edge off of being a "desperate housewife" to have a mellowing drink or two throughout the day.
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I'm here because I'm looking for other mothers in my position; drinking to surpass the monotony and stress of mommydom and enhance the mood, attitude and spirit for constant lack of adult interaction, and over-interrelation with children and children's interests. That's how I've summarized my scenario, anyhow. Constantly being on level with a child; educating, redirecting, care-taking, supervising, and so on is not effortless. In fact, it can be exhausting and annoying - but I LOVE it. With all that being said, I feel I'm a better mother under the influence. I'm more relaxed, funnier, more interactive, and definitely more patient. Call me sick. Tell me I need help. Being a stay at home mom is a never-ending job, an under-appreciated career, and a lonely playground for lots of very intelligent women. Cheers!
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