Meandering anecdotes and an occasional incisive comment, courtesy of an overeducated, feminist former-professional, who is continually outsmarted by her overly-gifted children and genius spouse and who seeks refuge in books, cocktails, and the occasional Xanax.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
she makes me nervous
Seven year-old Iris Uber Alles just walked in and asked, "How do you spell 'j'accuse'?"
p.s. It turns out she is writing a note to her teacher, reading in part, "J'accuse, Mr. Hopper, and I really mean it."
I really, really want to know what the dream was about. Please!
I feel a tad shy about meeting people from the blog. I'd feel obligated to display a coruscating wit and not to disappoint. But that does not mean it is out of the question...
I really, really want to know what the dream was about. Please!
Sure, here's the journal entry I made for myself when I woke up:
May 24, 2007 --------------------
Such weird dreams
I dreamt I met the drunken housewife. I had somehow managed to track her down and run into her in person. I met her little girls and saw her husband from a distance. Her husband had a (blog post?) with pictures of all the houses he had lived in . C--- was a nervous woman and seemed very odd. She gave me a plastic ziplock bag full of pills, at least some of which were tranquilizers. We were drinking together, it was some kind of party. I was eager about the pills*. I took one. Then I worried I would collapse and my parents would notice. There were more people in the dream from that scene**, especially Mermaid*** who was still with her old boyfriend. She was involved in buying land up north. It was sold as a length by a road with a power generator on it.
Second dream or maybe later in the first. I’m travelling through San Francisco. I go to a restaurant downtown, and they offer me a bad seat because I am a woman eating alone. I feel put upon and either imagine or do tell them off. This morphs into one of my convulsive fantasies. Embarrassed (because I did it in a restaurant) and frightened (because it was unwilled), I hastily leave. In the next part I am talking to [my ex] (on the phone) which somehow morphs into overhearing him with a woman (over the phone) he is seducing. He tells her a lot of lies, like his accent**** is Australian, and they go on to having sex (which I can overhear) which morphs into me standing in the same room, unseen, with my back to them. I tell myself why won’t I look, I turn around. It is not so bad. I feel strange, but not angry or hurt or jealous . (Maybe a little contempt?) I’m standing, (naked?), wrapped in my cream colored flannel sheet. There are three other women here, friends of the woman [my ex] is in bed with. They ignore the fucking and seem unable to see me. (I am a ghost?) I leave.
Images of sports – people waterskiing but with invisible water skis/boats, music, like a commercial, strong, healthy bodies. I imagine myself running***** and pushing through the fatigue.
I wake up and worry that [my ex] has the gall to forge my signature******.
* I don't take pills in real life. The dream assumes I am living with my parents, which is weird in and of itself. ** Diox, Squish *** The girl who turned me on to your journal **** My ex doesn’t have an accent but I have a friend who’s a bit of a “player”, South African, and whose name sounds almost exactly like my ex’s *****exercising in the Panhandle. I keep planning to, have bought shoes for it, but haven’t actually done it yet. ******Long, dramatic story. I won’t go into it here.
OMG, A., how long were you in the Diox scene? I was an OG in that scene (I woke up one day and Eric P. had created the Diox list), but I drifted out of it when I procreated. My husband wasn't into it any more (he was never on the list or that into the scene), and when I had little kids, hanging out at the Anon Salon until 3 AM didn't seem feasible.
I'm not really nervous and don't carry around bags of pills, I promise.
I was active in SFWOW 1997-2001. In 1998 I was on their board, which was part of a elist named "whizbang". Mary C. sent a camp&sons invite to whizbang, I went, and that's how I met Diox. I have friends in that scene and have gone to parties/campouts over the years, but I was never relaly part of the "in crowd" and I was never actually on either the Squish or Diox lists. But I liked knowing the people because they were smart and weird, and I go to something every now and then to stay in touch.
So it's possible we've already met. I would not know because I am very bad with names.
Actually, I was certain even during the dream that the dream-you looked very different than the real you.
I am not a nervous person (depressed lately, but not nervous). I do have some tranquilizers, though! They are left over from my trip to my nephew's funeral or my husband's family reunion, I forget which. I don't tend to carry them around, though.
I think I am using Mary C's old towels for my kittens (she donated some to me kindly, and the saddest part was that her discarded old towels were probably better than my regular towels, sigh).
9 comments:
IUA Antoinette has spoken. Let Mr. Hooper eat cake.
Hey you showed up in my dream last night. My friend says this means I should take you out for a drink.
I really, really want to know what the dream was about. Please!
I feel a tad shy about meeting people from the blog. I'd feel obligated to display a coruscating wit and not to disappoint. But that does not mean it is out of the question...
bwahahahahahahah.
Heads should roll.
I really, really want to know what the dream was about. Please!
Sure, here's the journal entry I made for myself when I woke up:
May 24, 2007
--------------------
Such weird dreams
I dreamt I met the drunken housewife. I had somehow managed to track her down and run into her in person. I met her little girls and saw her husband from a distance. Her husband had a (blog post?) with pictures of all the houses he had lived in . C--- was a nervous woman and seemed very odd. She gave me a plastic ziplock bag full of pills, at least some of which were tranquilizers. We were drinking together, it was some kind of party. I was eager about the pills*. I took one. Then I worried I would collapse and my parents would notice. There were more people in the dream from that scene**, especially Mermaid*** who was still with her old boyfriend. She was involved in buying land up north. It was sold as a length by a road with a power generator on it.
Second dream or maybe later in the first. I’m travelling through San Francisco. I go to a restaurant downtown, and they offer me a bad seat because I am a woman eating alone. I feel put upon and either imagine or do tell them off. This morphs into one of my convulsive fantasies. Embarrassed (because I did it in a restaurant) and frightened (because it was unwilled), I hastily leave. In the next part I am talking to [my ex] (on the phone) which somehow morphs into overhearing him with a woman (over the phone) he is seducing. He tells her a lot of lies, like his accent**** is Australian, and they go on to having sex (which I can overhear) which morphs into me standing in the same room, unseen, with my back to them. I tell myself why won’t I look, I turn around. It is not so bad. I feel strange, but not angry or hurt or jealous . (Maybe a little contempt?) I’m standing, (naked?), wrapped in my cream colored flannel sheet. There are three other women here, friends of the woman [my ex] is in bed with. They ignore the fucking and seem unable to see me. (I am a ghost?) I leave.
Images of sports – people waterskiing but with invisible water skis/boats, music, like a commercial, strong, healthy bodies. I imagine myself running***** and pushing through the fatigue.
I wake up and worry that [my ex] has the gall to forge my signature******.
* I don't take pills in real life. The dream assumes I am living with my parents, which is weird in and of itself.
** Diox, Squish
*** The girl who turned me on to your journal
**** My ex doesn’t have an accent but I have a friend who’s a bit of a “player”, South African, and whose name sounds almost exactly like my ex’s
*****exercising in the Panhandle. I keep planning to, have bought shoes for it, but haven’t actually done it yet.
******Long, dramatic story. I won’t go into it here.
OMG, A., how long were you in the Diox scene? I was an OG in that scene (I woke up one day and Eric P. had created the Diox list), but I drifted out of it when I procreated. My husband wasn't into it any more (he was never on the list or that into the scene), and when I had little kids, hanging out at the Anon Salon until 3 AM didn't seem feasible.
I'm not really nervous and don't carry around bags of pills, I promise.
I was active in SFWOW 1997-2001. In 1998 I was on their board, which was part of a elist named "whizbang". Mary C. sent a camp&sons invite to whizbang, I went, and that's how I met Diox. I have friends in that scene and have gone to parties/campouts over the years, but I was never relaly part of the "in crowd" and I was never actually on either the Squish or Diox lists. But I liked knowing the people because they were smart and weird, and I go to something every now and then to stay in touch.
So it's possible we've already met. I would not know because I am very bad with names.
Actually, I was certain even during the dream that the dream-you looked very different than the real you.
Meaning I don't think you're a skinny, nervous women who carries around ziplocked bags full of pharmaceuticals (while drinking, no less).
I am not a nervous person (depressed lately, but not nervous). I do have some tranquilizers, though! They are left over from my trip to my nephew's funeral or my husband's family reunion, I forget which. I don't tend to carry them around, though.
I think I am using Mary C's old towels for my kittens (she donated some to me kindly, and the saddest part was that her discarded old towels were probably better than my regular towels, sigh).
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